thetldrfandomcom-20200213-history
The Coming of Gabe Newell
"Do not forget soon the twenty-ninth of June The Umbilical treason and plot I know of no reason the Umbilical treason should ever be forgot...." —The sage OrcGaiusMcMannus speaking while in political asylum in OT:C The events of The Coming of Gabe Newell began early morning on Tuesday, June 29th of the year 2010. First Contact First contact was made when Kayc decided to send Gabe an email after a thread was made questioning if the famous Gabe Newell emails were real. Kayc received a response from Gabe, and sent a reply back asking Him to post on The TLDR. The Blessing of the Forum Gabe received the email and, to everyones surprise, he decided to bless the forum with his presence. He created a thread in which everyone was granted the honor of praising him in. There were a few non-believers at the beginning but a IP-check by Morek confirmed that Gabe was in fact in Norway as he had stated in his email. During this time of joy and happiness, the Umbis sat in their forum, brewing jealousy and spouting blasphemy about his Holiness. One especially retarded Umbi (who happened to be an admin; unsurprising as it is generally Umbian tradition for the biggest dumbfucks to wield the most power) posted Gabe's IP info, pages after it had been posted by Morek, acting as if he had just found out some incredible piece of information (that Gabe was in Europe) and that it wasn't the real Gabe. We can assume from this that he was indeed retarded and didn't read the thread. The Faggotry of the Dumbi King Hours later, the thread had reached several pages, and Gabe's reputation soared to heights previously thought unattainable. His followers were posting and waiting, waiting for his return. At long last he returned, and could be seen browsing the thread. Just as the rejoicing began, it was cut short. Gabe disappeared again and he was next discovered to have created a thread on the Umbi side of the forum. Praising the Umbi for being the better forum. Obviously any idiot could tell that something was wrong, it had to be a troll, how could Gabe suddenly know so much about the forums to tell the sections apart as well as the posters? Finally a voice of reason appeared in the form of A Holy Warrior of Gabe. The Holy Warrior stated his disappointment that after a making a thread that did not receive the faithful responses it should have, Gabe not only had been turned off by the forum, but now the Umbi admins had changed His password for a short-lived, sub-par troll. Little did the warrior know that he was correct. A quick IM was sent to Pintsized, to see if his theory was correct. After a few IP checks, it was confirmed that Duncan, the Dumbi King, had changed Gabe's password to post his shitty attempt at a troll in an attempt to take away the pride the TLDR was feeling and to make up for the overwhelming jealousy he held that his Holiness had not posted on his forum, but rather the superior TLDR, once again confirming to all members of both boards who the greater forum was. Declaration of War and the Overthrowing of the Dumbi King After the evidence was posted for the public to see, a war was declared and the Umbi forum was spammed to utter shit. Eventually the entire forum was made unreadable. During this period of spam and attacks on the Umbi, Duncan was stripped of his admin-ship by the people's hero, NL, and the people rejoiced. Return to Peace The forum returned to normality relatively quickly as shitty posters like Damela began their daily posting schedule without actually reading anything and making their shitty threads as if it were an average day. A few skirmishes continued on the Umbi board lead by some of the still vengeance-consumed TLDRs and a few attempts of attacks were made on the TLDR but they were dealt with swiftly. Category:History